Could I Really Be Done?

Do I want another baby right now?

Absolutely not! But am I done forever?

I really can't tell you yes without my heart pulling me the other way.

I just finished packing up all of Kade's newborn and 0-3 month clothes and I wanted to cry. Maybe it's because they are so close but I can't come to terms with my baby being gone when I am 44!

Maybe this will happen if I have 20.

Is it just part of being a mom?

Letting go?

I really don't know, but I do know I don't like this feeling.

How will I be when I send Krew to kindergarten? and then Kade 1 short year later. Don't even get me thinking about sending them to college one right after the other.

Did I ever imagine yet alone plan to have my boys 15 months apart?

No.

So I guess what that means is life isn't planned, and if in 3 years from now my heart is still yearning for more.......

Then I will have to convince my husband.

Until then one of my lucky friends will be receiving big boxes full of tiny clothes....

Except for maybe a few: Which I will keep for me....to hang onto forever.