Trav

Last Friday we received a phone call.
The one with a number that looks familiar but your not sure where.
The one that you know brings some news.
The one that says someone is gone forever.
It hit hard and it fast.
It didn't matter that we haven't seen him in 3 years.
What mattered was we would never see him again.
Never hear his laugh.
What mattered was for the last 3 years he'd been talking about coming to see us and we'd been talking about going to see him.
We will be going tomorrow.
Too little too late.

When I think about losing a friend there are no words. The last person I knew personally and was close to that passed away was my Grandpa... I was 6.
So to say that I do not know how to handle this is an understatement.
I look at my husband who has lost more friends in the past 2 years than I care to share and I realize how amazingly strong he is.
I look around at my family and friends and realize I don't want to go 3 years before I see them and then it be too late.
I realize I need to hug my babies more and worry about dishes less.
I need to have girls nights and laugh with the beautiful people I surround myself with.
I need to travel and see my friends who I am not lucky enough to live close to.
I need to continue to date my husband.
I need to live and I need to grow old because as they say it is a privilege denied to many.

So tomorrow when we drive 14 hours to Yakima WA we will be jamming out to a Trav mix that I'm sure will make me laugh, make me cry, and probably make me curse his choice of music.
We will share memories with some of the most amazing people I know and we will most likely be forced to have a shot of Yukon Jack. But most of all I will laugh because that is what he would want.

TWO

Dear Kader,
Can you believe that you are two?? These past years have absolutely flown by. I honestly don't even know what to say about you my baby boy. You are a million different things rolled into one. You are one of the meanest sweetest little boys I know. Let me explain.... You react impulsively and have a terrible temper. (Thank Grandpa and Dad) This being said you hit, bite, and scream often. Sometimes I am convinced that you aren't even sure why you do it.  However you hate to see people you love hurt. Your brother is very sensitive, and when you see him cry you do whatever you can to help your Krew. This is often the reason of your not so sweet behaviors. The other day Hope made your brother cry and you weren't so kind to her in the after math. You ask me for "nuggles" all the time and hold on tight if only for a split second.
Your smile is by far the best smile on the face of the planet. You smile so big your dimples shine and your eyes disappear. You light up my life with that smile. You are a dancing fool and always ask to "move it." When we drive to school in the morning you always tell me and your brother to dance. Talk about an amazing way to start even the grumpiest days.  Your big brother is your best friend, but you also love to play with Maddux and you ask about every other day to go to his house. You like to fight over Ben and Mo and who they belong to. Krew always explains that they are both of yours. I can't wait to see your reaction when they have kids of their own! Your main goal in life is to grow big and strong like daddy so you clean your plate most of the time. Have I mentioned yet how incredibly smart you are? You know how old you are and yell it for the world to know. You have learned your colors and most of your shapes. Your vocabulary is out of this world and impresses me every day. To say the least Kade I thank God every day he gave me you.
Mommy loves you to the moon and back sweet boy. Happy Birthday.

Life Lessons

While on pinterest the other day I saw this quote and it really struck a cord with me.

I believe as a parent you try so hard to be perfect and a good role model, but I also believe that we can always improve. So while trying to be the person I want you boys to be I have developed a list of qualities that I want you to see daily so you can understand their importance.

1. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE: It is so easy to walk around being angry, but in the end that does nothing but hurt yourself. If you try your hardest to only focus on the things you love and the things that are good in your life you will find your heart full.

2. Forgive quickly...This is by far the biggest challenge for me because I am so much like my dad. Forgiveness is not something that comes easily to me but it is something I am working on. What is the point of holding a grudge when you can let it go. That doesn't mean you should forget the lessons it taught you.

3. Material things are NOT important. I have always given you boys the best. I am stating today that this will no longer be the case. While you will always wear clean nice clothes you will no longer have a new outfit everyday (This is a bit over exaggerated, but not much...). There is no need for a billion toys when you have these amazing imaginations that get more use than any object I could buy you.

4. Play... There will always be time to clean but we have so many limited beautiful days that we will take advantage of them 100%.

5. Work Hard. While playing is important it is also important to remember that in order to play you have to work hard on the other days.

6. Don't sweat the small stuff. Krew the other day you drew all over the recliner and in all honesty I just walked away. I wanted to yell I wanted to put you in time out, but I also knew that I would not put your feelings below a piece of furniture. I came back into the room a few minutes later after screaming into my pillow to hear you say, "Look at the e I drew mommy. Aren't you so proud of me?" At that moment I knew I made the right decision of walking away when I was angry. Don't get me wrong we had a very serious conversation afterward about writing on the couches.

7. Read. You can never read enough. You will find so much joy reading a book and losing yourself in the story.

8. Get out and move! While I have not made it to the gym nearly enough this summer I think I've done something much more important. I have showed you how to get exercise in your own back yard. We have spent hours running through the sprinklers, Daddy and I have strapped you on our backs and hiked the bridal trail, you've gone on walks every day. Needless to say I am glad I made the decision to spend this time with you.

9. Disagree respectfully. I think the reason your daddy and I work so well together is because we have very different opinions, but the majority of the time we disagree respectfully. This is also something I know I can do better on and I work on it daily, but you will know how to state your point without hurting feelings.

10. Give.  Your grandma is the picture of giving. I mean this in many different ways, and this is something I plan on showing you rather than telling you about.

There are a million other little things I want you to become, but right now I am choosing to focus on those 10 little traits and we will go from there. I have no doubt that you will become great men, but I also know that my role in who you become is much more important than I may have noticed. I promise to remember that you are always watching, and I hope you see something great!

XOXO,
Mommy

~3~

Dear Krew,
I cannot believe that tomorrow you will be 3 years old. You are such a big boy and mommy is so proud of you. Over the last year you have accomplished so much that I don't even know where to begin! Your biggest accomplishment is being 100% potty trained. YAHOO!!! You continue to be one of the sweetest little boys I know and play so good with all of your friends. You have a heart of gold and truly care for other people and animals. Whenever Kade cries you remind him that it is going to be ok and you are the first person to comfort him. The other day I got out of the shower and I heard you tell him, "It's okay Kader mommy is never going to leave us." While we were at the fair the other day you were so sad for the animals at the petting zoo and kept telling me and daddy they were starving and it wasn't nice. I think it is so funny how you have an intuition for things like that because you did not say a word about the 4-H animals because you just knew they were taken care of.

Not only do you have a heart of gold but you have brains that boggle my mind on a daily basis. It is so funny how fast you learn things when I am not aware of it. We have been going to science camp at the science zone and at your first lesson they taught you about the eye. I thought it was way over your head and just let you wrestle with Maddux the whole time. Then a week later we were driving and you said, "Mommy what color is your iris?" I told you brown and you said, "Yep and your pupil is black." I will never doubt how much you can take from a lesson again.

With both of these amazing attributes it does not surprise me one bit that playing doctor is one of your all time favorite games. When you fix one of your animals you take such care and talk to them in the sweetest voice. You then fix their problem and help your next patient.

Not only do you have brains and a beautiful heart but I must also mention just how handsome you are. When you sleep at night I still sit there and stare and your perfect little face and think about how there is not one thing I could change on you. Your smile stretches across your face and your laugh makes everyone laugh with you. Your blue eyes dance when you are doing something mischievous and your naughty little grin make it so hard to be mad. You are just flat AMAZING!!!


Krew I want you to know that mommy thinks the world of you and cannot imagine life without you. From the day you came into my life it has been brighter and full of love.
You have taught me so much over the last 3 years that have made me a better person.
Always remember sweet boy that you are loved by so many people, especially your mommy and daddy.

To the moon and back my big 3 year old!!
XOXO Mommy

So here are your answers to your birthday questions... I have to admit some took a little prodding and some I think you completely made up :-)



What is your favorite toy? "My dinosaurs"
What is your favorite show? "Jake"
What is your favorite food? "Apples"
What is your favorite thing to do with daddy? "I like fishing wif daddy"
What is your favorite thing to wear? "My skivvies"
What is your favorite game? "Hide and Seek wif daddy"
What is your favorite color? "Blue and Pink"
What is your favorite animal? "The Horses and cows and dogs and tigers and dinosaurs."
What is your favorite book? "This one" (How do Dinosaurs say Goodnight)
Who is your best friend? "My very best Parker and my best Maddux and my best Kade and my best cohen."
What is your favorite thing to do outside? "Play in the water"
What is your favorite drink? "JUICE"
What is your favorite holiday? "Santa Clause"
What is your favorite thing to sleep with? "My Riley" (Riley does not sleep with you....EVER)
What do you want to be when you grow up? "Catch the bad guys"
What is your favorite movie? "Rio"
What is your favorite thing to do with mommy? "I do not know....read books"
Where is your favorite place to go? "The Animal zoo"

All boy all the time

Fourth of July

This is by far my favorite holiday of the year.

BBQs with family.

Flags on nearly every house.

Patriotic shirts.

The amazing music that makes my eyes well up with tears. 

This is the holiday where I feel so proud of the country I live in.

I feel proud of my husband and our friends who serve it.

Not only our military friends but the police officers, firemen, teachers, nurses, and every other person who helps make this country great. 

May we always remember what an amazing place we live in and do our part to keep it great for our children.

God Bless America

You're My Best

Krew's most recent adorableness is to call the people his best ____.

We were at the science zone and he heard his buddy and yelled, "Mommy I hear my best Maddux." 

I seriously about died.

He now calls me his best mommy, Seth his best daddy, best brother, best Kasha, best grandma, best papa, best Mo, best Riley...you get the point.

However the other day we decided to take the boys on separate adventures so they could each enjoy undivided attention all day. Krew was off with Seth to go fishing and I stayed home with Kade.

That night when they were reunited they instantly became attached at the hip. Kade broke down crying for his brother when he went to the bathroom and was instantly relieved when he returned a few moments later. The next morning Krew woke up and didn't ask for me or Seth but wanted his tater chip. When Kade came into the room he wrapped his arms around him and said, "Kader you are my best buddy. I missed you so much when I was fishing."

Talk about melt a momma's heart! 

While I was thinking he just started call people his best ____ because he thought that's what you did, I now know it is because those people are his best.

The people he likes to be around.

But most importantly the people he loves.

He is my best Krew.

A Night To Remember

While I would say that parenting is always rewarding there are certain nights that take the cake.

Every night I lay in bed and think about how blessed I really am.

It doesn't matter if I played ref to fights all day or if we played outside all day.

The end result is the same. I am thankful.

Then every once in a while you get a moment that keeps you awake because you just can't believe you were lucky enough to be a part of it.

Last night was one of those nights. 

I took the boys to the CNFR and had a blast.

Melissa came with me and we met my mom, dad, sister, and Dustin there.

From the very beginning they showed their true personalities. 

Kade went nuts during the bareback, saddle bronc, and bull riding, while Krew love the calf roping and steer wrestling. 

This is typical because Krew is my calm play it safe kid while Kade is my jump of the couch just to see if I can baby. 

I probably looked like a lunatic with a cheesy smile on my face all night watching them. 

Kade would yell, "GO, GO, GO!" While pumping his fists the entire time. 

Krew would clap as hard as he could when, "The cowboys roped those cows." 

It was a moment that I felt truly blessed to watch my boys experience something new. 

I have also gotten a lot of leverage out of telling Krew, "Cowboys go pee in the potty, Cowboys clip their finger nails, Cowboys go to sleep on their own." I plan on taking this as far as I can! 

All in all it was one for the record books, one moment that when I tell my grand kids about their dads this story will be one of them.

These are the moments we remember. 

Kade and His Papa

 My little Cowboy

 Krew and his Mo